Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Keep Calm Carry On..

If you have a Royal Wedding party six days before the actual ceremony, remember to wave on the red carpet (vinyl table cover) as if it was from your chariot/Pope-mobile/carriage/Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade float. 
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Remember also to thank your lovely Aunt Anne for hooking everyone up with such delicious treats.  Even if someone took a bite out of a shortbread jelly cookie and put it back (ahem sister). 
Cucumber Sandwiches, cocolate strawberries, salmon spread, english tea cookies and so so much more
Remember also to tell Aunt Anne that she can seriously rock a Tiara. 
Bling!
Remember to get your sister a cooler, and perhaps a snow suit, considering she ordered the Royal ice cream cake from Baskin Robbins only to discover the people there didn’t know what the heck she was talking about.  Perhaps they missed the memo from corporate? Instead they made her a cake that said: Will 4 Kate 4 Ever.  She picked that baby up and drove the three hours home with zip lock bags of ice on top of it and the air conditioning blowing full force despite the fact it was barely 50 degrees out.  A for effort Sister, A indeed.
Remember that its the thought that counts, not just the presentation.
 We melt for Wills
Remember to wear your crown jewel replicas. (remember when I got that beauty?)
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Remember to provide your guests with plenty of party flair.

  Brilliant! 
Remember to NOT grab Prince Phillip’s face mask, since no one knows who he is anyway (the queen had a husband? Where have I been?)
imposters
Remember that if you’re going to a Royal party, it is appropriate to wear the Queen’s favorite jogging suit, especially if you have photo evidence of her wearing it (not at all photo-shopped).
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Remember that if you are going to a party and stop by GoodWill just hours before, you can have the best outfit of all time.  Well played Theresa, well played. 
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Remember that if you bring evidence of your lineage tracing back to the queen (there are a lot of cousins to keep track of), and Kevin Bacon, you are entitled to the most melty will & kate ice cream cake.  Fact.
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Remember to tell your mom how rocking she looks with two boobs.  Also just in general :)
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Remember to have pretty low expectations for the lifetime movie you watch at the party about Will & Kate, but secretly like it anyway.
    
Mostly I hope to remember these things for round two with Emily at 4AM on Friday.  See you there!